(i.e. What do your negative emotions give you permission to do?)
I am often asked about the point of negative experiences, feelings, perspectives, and why we go through them.
There is a positive to EVERY perceived negative in existence.
If we are here to experience, learn, evolve, we can do this in an infinite number of ways.
And we are often motivated through extremes, especially when a situation brings us into discomfort, pain, and especially suffering.
We often hear stories about addicts hitting rock bottom, of partners within abusive relationships finally having had enough. People reach breaking point, and finally have the conversation that could have been spoken years ago. They become so unhealthy, physically or mentally, that the pain motivates them to choose change.
On some level, we can often believe that we have to get to the worst point in order to be motivated enough to take a new step.
Those moments when we feel hormonal, enraged, or indignant, often push us to act. But are the actions taken in those moments aligned?
Sometimes we actually feel that the perceived power of anger makes change possible. We feel righteous in our anger, possibly believing that another deserves to be punished, or spoken to in ways that we would not normally speak. We may believe on some level that it is selfish refuse a request, or feel guilty setting a boundary. But once we feel angry enough, we feel justified in lashing out, putting that person ‘in his place’.
What does ANGER motivate you to say?
What does SADNESS push you to do?
What does FRUSTRATION encourage you to address?
The reality is that, while our most uncomfortable emotions can motivate us to take positive action, the energy supporting it lacks depth or a solid foundation. This is why we can start down a positive path away from pain, but often find our way back. If you are motivated by suffering, you find it again.
What I have come to understand, after years of avoiding the discomfort, and waiting until I got so angry that I could not see the situation clearly, is that I was waiting too long to act.
If you wait until the point where you cannot see the truth, understand another’s perspective, or feel pressured to act NOW to avoid the suffering any longer, you have missed that magical moment of aligned action.
Often times, as a problem builds, the signs are more subtle, quiet whispers indicating that there is an issue to address. The more you listen to your intuition and feelings, the easier it becomes to identify an issue before it becomes a problem. You can reduce the drama, the suffering, by listening to your emotions when they are easier to feel, hear, see.
Every feeling has a positive message for you. Even your rage! The key is to speak to it, asking for the positive.
Ask your anger, “What positive steps can I take right now?”, or “What positive messages do you have for me?”
Your anger probably has some incredible advice about saying no, setting clearer boundaries, or changing the dynamics within a relationship. Your deep sadness may be telling you to get out and meet your tribe, or find activities or groups where you can explore your creativity.
These feelings are a call to action, reminding you that you have the strength to speak up or take aligned action. And when you begin to be inspired to act by your positive feelings and experiences, you will allow yourself to feel better, lighter, and learn through more positive interactions.
When you change your relationship with emotion, you change your interactions with the world around you.
Stop allowing your pain to motivate you.
Allow yourself to evolve with grace, and be inspired by the process!
P.S Please feel free to join the conversation on Facebook! This will be shared on my page, to comment and share!
Download: Would you like to know how to connect with your emotions, in the highest and best way,
to understand what you are feeling in every moment, with grace,
to resolve any confusion or avoidance, when your emotions guide you,
to know that you are worthy and deserving of being guided by your intuition, in your daily life,
to know what it feels like to be inspired by positive feelings, experiences, and interactions, on every level?
Say yes and receive! <3